Friday, February 12, 2010

...The Battle Is Not Yours, But God's 2 Chronicles 20:15

This passage from God's word is one that I've known, but was recently reminded of in a book I was reading. As I began to pray and contemplate what message God would have me write as I compose an update on Meagan's blog, this scripture came to mind, along with the Bible story behind the wonderful truth. Jehoshaphat and God's people were in big trouble, facing the most terrifying battle of their lives. In many ways, it seemed that they should give up, but God told them otherwise. "Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God's" 2 Chronicles 20:15

For the past 12 years, Meagan has been trying to fight a vast army which has been the lies of the enemy manifested in an eating disorder. There have been periods of progress, but never true victory. What was the missing piece? Why did she keep falling back into the destructive ed patterns? These questions have been asked time and time again. Probably the same reason I kept falling back into trying to control the eating disorder myself. God doesn't intend for us to fight the battle; the battle is His!!! Victory for me came when I let go and gave the battle to God, totally and completely. Not until then was I set free from my obsession to fix the problem. This is what Meagan is finding to be true for herself as she is learning daily at Mercy just what giving the battle to God entails.

First she's learning to totally relinquish control and let God take control. This has been a major challenge. From control of her food to control of her time, she's learning how to allow God to be in control. Resistance to allowing that total control has only brought pain, but surrendering to God's will is bringing about transformation and freedom. Meagan's words from a recent letter; "I finally feel like things are beginning to shift for me, its still hard at times, but I feel like I'm so much more aware of what God is doing as well as the conviction and guidance he gives and I'm more willing to listen - I'm finally starting to let go, trust, and not lean on my own understanding."

I believe willingness to relinquish control comes as we learn that God CAN be trusted. Just like trust of other people comes from getting to know them better, the same holds true with trusting God. We have to get to know Him better. We do that by spending time with Him daily through prayer, meditation, and reading His Word. The program at Mercy is saturating Meagan in the word and she been like a sponge absorbing ever bit of the truth.
John 8:32 "Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."

A few weekends ago Meagan lost the privilege to take and make phone calls due to not meeting a weekly weight goal. At first she was devastated, but it turned out to be a wonderful learning experience. Since she wouldn't be taking or making phone calls on Sat. or Sun. and the weekends there at Mercy are pretty low-key, she had plenty of time to spend with God, and that's just what she did. Since that first weekend of no calls, she has opted to voluntarily continue to not take or make phone calls for several weekends. This is a true testament of how God works all things out for good. In a recent letter Meagan wrote; "Although it's been tough and I miss talking to you very much, I know God had more intent than to just discipline the daughter He loves, He also wanted me to use this time to be with Him and nurture out relationship. My worth and happiness cannot be based on anything but the Lord." Then in another letter she said; " has been so worth it spending time with the Lord. I can't help but think about the verse Psalms 45:10 that talks about leaving your father's house and seeking the Lord fully - I know how important it is that I put my dependence in God above all else and through this journey here at Mercy He is teaching me and showing me what this is like. He is the only constant in my life, no person, thing, addiction, or place can give me completely what He can give me ALWAYS! So my dependence and trust in him is something that continues to grow while in the process bringing me the desire to follow him more and know him better. He's also revealing to me a peace and acceptance that I never thought possible."

Needless to say, we are very encouraged by Meagan's recent letters. We have missed getting to talk to her on the weekends, but we are gladly willing to give up our weekend phone calls knowing that she is spending that time with the Lord. Through daily surrender to God's will, her freedom is being won against this battle! And we give Him all the Glory!

Meagan and our family are so grateful for your continued prayers and support! Each of you are helping to make this victory possible through your prayers. May God abundantly bless you. I apologize for taking so long to post an update. We will be visiting Meagan in Nashville Mar. 12-14. I will do my best to post an update as soon as possible after our visit.
Posted by: Angela Vrba Feb. 23, 2010